Scrambled Radio Signals and the Plight of the Single Human

 

My brother and I where sitting in Westport, in Kansas City, last night, Friday, and I came to realize something very important.  The realization was almost an epiphany.  Let’s face it, we are all adults here.  The reason we humans go out on a Friday night and socialize is to attract members of the opposite sex, or same sex.  Hopefully, if it all goes well we get to come home or get a date with that person.

The problem is, we humans are all like radio waves with separate signals.  Twisted, scrambled radio waves.  We are fuzzy frequencies all floating in the air mixing together to create a jumbled mass of irritating static.  It’s like when you’re traveling across the country and you’re jamming to one station then all of a sudden it starts to fade and another station barely audible over shadows the music you were just rocking out to.  This is our conundrum.

When we humans get together our frequencies are mixing with other’s that are in the same area.  Some people have higher watts that over shadows most others.  These are the ones that have people receiving their songs and advertisements.  It’s all about the ads and who’s buying into them.  This is why some people with weaker frequencies, using less wattage, hang with other’s that have a higher audience to their advertisements.

I believe the FCC allowance for wattage use on a radio station is 50,000 watts.   I say fuck the FCC and fuck the other stations.  Turn your wattage up to 150,000 or 200,000 and get as many listeners as you can.  Get your ads out there.  Believe me it’s all about ad-revenue and who is buying your products.

If you can’t, or won’t bump up the watts and you obey by the rules.  You are going home alone.  Say goodnight, because your evening is over before it’s even begun.  This is Adam Koehler, signing off…….

Cheers,

Adam Koehler

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